When I was accused of indecent exposure, my name was dragged through the mud before I had the chance to defend myself. The accusation alone was enough to make front-page news, to turn heads when I walked down the street, and to cause a significant drop in my private therapy practice. People who once trusted me suddenly looked at me with suspicion.
But when my case was dismissed—when it was ruled that what I had done wasn’t a crime—there was barely a mention of it in the same newspapers that had so eagerly published the accusation. The damage had already been done.
This is the reality for countless men who face false accusations. In our culture, an accusation is often treated as a conviction, and once someone is branded with that kind of stigma, it rarely fades. Even when the truth is revealed, it doesn’t hold the same power as the initial lie.
I am not writing this blog because I want sympathy. I am writing it because I know I’m not alone.
I’ve heard too many stories from men who have been through the same thing—men whose lives were upended by an accusation that was later proven false. Men who lost jobs, relationships, reputations, and even their own sense of self-worth.
This is why I write.
I write for the men who are still afraid to tell their stories.
I write for those who have been demonized without evidence.
I write for the truth.
Dr. Arnold Barrett, PhD, LICSW 